Motherhood after egg donation
Egg donation is a technique that enables previously infertile women to experience the joys of motherhood. Many of our patients have spent years trying to get pregnant via IVF and other treatments, but have only met with failure upon failure. Unsurprisingly, they enjoy pregnancy and motherhood even more when these are finally achieved.
Similarities and differences during pregnancy
If you have never managed to become pregnant without egg donation, finding you are finally pregnant usually brings an overwhelming feeling of joy. This may of course be combined with anxiety about whether you will be able to carry the baby to term, plus some other worries unique to egg donation. Should you tell your family and friends about how the baby was conceived? Will the baby look like you and/or your partner? Will the whole experience be as wonderful as it would have been if you had been able to conceive the baby yourself, without medical help?
We understand all of these worries. And if you have been pregnant before, but sadly lost the baby you were carrying, you will have the additional anxiety of wondering whether the same thing will happen again. All we can say is that everybody experiences pregnancy differently, in whichever way their baby was conceived. Some women worry a lot; some worry a little. Most concerns can be split into two categories: medical and psychological issues.
Medical concerns
Egg recipients do unfortunately have a raised risk of pregnancy loss in the first trimester. The reason for this is that even if the oestrogens and progesterone that you take to sustain your pregnancy work in exactly the same way as if the pregnancy had occurred naturally, the dialogue between the embryo, ovary and uterus is different. In a ‘natural’ pregnancy, the embryo produces a hormone called HCG, which stimulates hormone production by the yellow body in the ovary. The ovary then produces hormones to support the pregnancy in the uterus. This dialogue does not occur in a pregnancy achieved through egg donation.
Because of this, 1/4 to 1/3 of women who get pregnant through egg donation experience some form of bleeding in the first trimester. Although this may not necessarily lead to pregnancy loss, it is naturally extremely worrying and is a risk for pregnancy loss. At AVA-Peter, we therefore supply you with medication that can stop the bleeding, and instructions on how to use it. In this way, you will have everything you need at home in case such an emergency situation arises. (The medication cannot of course prevent miscarriages caused by chromosomal defects, but it has certainly been effective in sustaining pregnancies threatened by hormonal problems.) This strategy has significantly improved our baby-take-home rates: 85% of those who get pregnant become mothers.
When it comes to the baby’s health, some conditions (such as the likelihood of Down’s Syndrome or other chromosomal defects) are actually less likely due to the young age of our donors. What’s more, women who go to the effort of undergoing egg donation treatment tend to be highly motivated and interested in keeping as healthy as possible. This includes ensuring they take vitamins such as folic acid (to guard against spina bifida), get regular check-ups and do everything they can to safeguard the baby’s health.
Psychological concerns
However delighted you are to be pregnant, you may have mixed feelings about the fact that your child does not have your genes. You may feel guilty about wishing that the baby would physically resemble you, or worry about what remarks people will make about the child’s appearance. If you have particular talents (for music or science, for example), you may be upset that these will not genetically be passed on to your child.
It is worth remembering that even with people who can conceive a child naturally, looks and skills do not always flow into the next generation. There are children who look like both parents, children who resemble one parent and children who do not look like either of their parents! As for intelligence or talent, just think of all the families you know in which the children somehow insist on being individuals rather than being as good (or bad!) at something as their parents. The love and stimulation with which you will surround your child will enable it to develop its true potential, in whichever direction this lies.
As the gestational mother (the person who carries the baby), you interact with your baby both before and after the birth. There is an enormous amount of physical and social contact involved in caring for a child. All aspects of day-to-day communication strengthen the bond. It is no wonder that egg recipients regard themselves as the baby’s “true” mother, because they have mothered their child since it was too tiny to be seen with the naked eye. Furthermore, each individual is formed not only through biological links to his or her parents but also by the time, environment and relationships in which he or she grows up.
At AVA-Peter, we are familiar with discussing these issues. The decision of whether to try for a child via egg donation is up to you. But we find that once our patients succeed in getting pregnant, the rush of love they feel for their future child tends to supersede all other concerns. The mother-child bond develops as the baby grows within you, and the excitement of feeling your child kick in your womb is just like that of any other mother. You nurture your baby with your body throughout all the weeks and months of pregnancy, and it is your womb that keeps it safe. Once the baby is ready, you go through the unforgettable experience of giving birth too. If you choose and are able to breastfeed, this can strengthen the emotional bond. As far as the baby is concerned, you are its mother and the person whom it will grow to love.
Interested in egg donation at AVA-Peter?
Please first fill in our questionnaire This will be assessed by one of our experienced doctors, who will then get in touch with you using your preferred contact method.
If you have any questions, an English-speaking receptionist is available to take your call on 007 81 2336 3059 between 07:00-14:00 Central European time (06.00-13.00 UK time). You can also reach us by e-mail at info@clinic.avapeter.com
We look forward to hearing from you!
Very kind regards,
Your AVA-Peter team
Related pages in other lnguages: Deutsch Eizellspende Netherlands Eiceldonatie Dansk Ægdonation
